BMW – 216, “Danger Boy”; February 3, 1995

Danger Boy, the plucky boy sidekick to esteemed superhero Crisis Man!

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Eric is supposed to be studying with this girl, because they have a test tomorrow, and presumably also because he’s not supposed to be dating anyone until he brings his grades up.  I still really feel that with that tiny little story line and Turner talking about mid-term grades, there was supposed to be another plot in the last episode, but there somehow wasn’t. Ah, well. Eric wants to hang out with this girl on Saturday, but she can’t, because her little 13 year old cousin is visiting from out of town. Why is that always a thing on these shows? It’s always a cousin visiting from out of town, and always just the one cousin and not the cousin’s parents, and it’s never over the holidays or anything. At least in this case the cousin is visiting on the weekend and not for an entire school week where she’s somehow allowed to attend classes despite not being a student at that school. I’m glad to see the “visiting cousin” story pretty much never happens on tv shows anymore, or if it does, it involves adults, which makes a bit more sense, especially since the adults the cousin is visiting usually live in New York or somewhere big like that.

Eric mentions he has a 13 year old brother, who is… 13. The girl asks what he’s like, and all Eric has to say is Cory is 13. Apparently the girl’s cousin is from Manhattan and is very mature, so Eric assures her that Cory is very mature as well. Then Cory runs into the room and says he’s a fountain.

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He runs upstairs to show Shawn his cool new trick, and Eric says he’ll talk to Cory about not being gross. Then Shawn comes downstairs to get a drink, later revealing he only came down because Cory told him Eric had an unbelievably hot girl with him. No offense to the actress or anything, but I’ve seen hotter girls on this show, like the blonde girl who was in the last episode, or Desiree the southern belle from a dozen episodes ago. I mean, this girl is good-looking, but I wouldn’t say she’s unbelievably hot. Well, anyway, whatever her name is likes Shawn, and tells Eric to invite Shawn to hang out with her cousin so she and Eric can go on a date, and stuff.

There’s a staff meeting at 4 pm, as Feeny reminds Turner. Does Feeny ever talk to any of the other teachers in this school? Are there actually any other teachers in this school? There’s Katherine, that blonde teacher Turner likes, who is in a couple episodes and doesn’t seem to actually teach a class, and there is definitely a health teacher, although we’ve never seen her, only a substitute for her class. There’s 400 people in the 7th grade alone and apparently there are only 4 teachers in the entire school, and one of them is the principal who doesn’t actually teach classes all day. Well, at the staff meeting, they’re getting saddled with all the life-sapping after-school clubs, which is weird, because 2 or 3 episodes ago, it seemed like all the clubs were already in session.

Eric finds Shawn and invites him to go on a double date with Kim and her cousin. Shawn thinks it’s weird that Eric’s inviting him and not Cory, and Eric sort of stumbles around and implies he already asked Cory without outright saying he did.

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Look at that! Other teachers! And one of them is Kathy Kinney, who you might remember from The Drew Carey Show. She’s assigning the teachers to all the clubs and activities, and by the look of things, there’s actually only 7 teachers in this school. Turner gets signed up for the senior ski trip – which oddly enough will come up in a later season – and Kathy Kinney signs Feeny up for chess club advisor without giving him a chance to agree with the decision. Feeny gets upset with everyone assuming just because he dresses and talks a certain way, he’s a perfect fit for the chess club.

….Why are they all meeting in the cafeteria and not the teacher’s lounge?

Amy spent a lot of money on getting her hair styled, even though Alan thinks her hair looks exactly the same, and I agree. And, scene.

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Cory laments being alone tonight, but Chubbie says his friend Potsi is here – by Potsi he means Shawn (he called Cory “Curly”). Shawn says he’s on a date and bring Cory over, and then it comes out that Shawn and Eric on a double date with Kim and Kim’s cousin, and Cory’s feelings are hurt that Eric didn’t ask him, his own brother, to go. Also, Kim’s Cousin has this amazingly 90s outfit on.

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Okay, it’s honestly more of an early 2000s outfit, but still!

The lime green, and the polka dots, and the denim… There’s so much 90s Plaid on this show, it’s great seeing a totally 90s non-plaid outfit.

Later that evening, Cory confronts Eric, and Eric tells him the reason he didn’t ask Cory to go on the date is because Kim didn’t want him to. Eric calls him safe and boring. Cory argues he’s totally dangerous, and then Morgan comes in and says her stuffed bear had a bad dream, and asks if the bear can sleep with Cory. Cory then calls himself jello.

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After class, Cory and Shawn have a chat. Shawn’s sorry for not telling Cory about the double date, but Cory says he’s not angry with Shawn, or with anyone. He’s boring, and safe. He just has to accept this. Shawn teleports out of the room when Cory isn’t looking, and Feeny has a chat with Cory about people assuming things about a person based on their appearance. He says that you should defy people’s expectations and learn and grow and rub people’s noses in how you defied their expectations. Cory says he and Feeny should do something dangerous, something… stupid. Feeny kind of agrees.

Later at the house, we find out that Alan lost $300 at his poker game last night. Alan’s poker buddies called him names, so he had to lose $300, or something. Amy tells Alan to just ask for the money back. Alan says he can’t do that, and Amy points out that Alan asked her to ask for the money back for her hair, why should their situations be any different? Alan makes fun of her hair again and they kiss. And, end.

Eric asks Cory to go to the batting cages with him, except Cory isn’t home. Cory left a note saying he’s going to show everyone who thinks he’s safe and boring. He’s going to the amusement park with Mr. Feeny.

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Cory and Feeny are going to be the first people to ride this new roller coaster, “The Last Ride.” It’s apparently the most dangerous roller coaster in the country. You have to sign a waiver before you ride it. And an organ donor card. Eric and Turner arrive, each having gotten a note. Eric demands Cory get out of the car, not so much caring if Feeny rides it. Cory says it’s too late for Eric to care about Cory. Eric says he totally buys that Cory is dangerous, and is definitely going next time there’s a double date. This pleases Cory and he tries to get out, right as the car begins its journey.

The news reporter, Katey Segal’s sister-in-law, narrates all the terrifying things the car goes through, including a spinning wall of fire. The entire ride only lasts like 30 seconds, though. The car returns, with Cory in the back seat and Feeny in the front, even though they were in the opposite seats when the car left.

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Turner says Feeny will totally be in charge of the ski trip now, but Feeny doesn’t want the ski trip, or the chess club. He just wants Cory to stop squeezing his back. Eric and Turner agree that Cory and Feeny are totally dangerous, and they get out of the car. Cory says he left one of his shoes in the car, so Eric agrees to get it out for Cory. Turner helps him, and then Cory and Feeny push the other two into the seats and tell the controller guy to start the ride.

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Alan has invited Amy’s hair stylist to the poker game, I suppose as an effort to both win back the money Alan lost, and get the money that Amy spent on her stupid hairstyle back. The hair stylist turns out to be pretty good at poker, and also very lucky, so Alan says he gives up and goes to go upstairs. The hairstylist makes chicken noises at Alan, which makes him angry. Everyone makes fun of Alan, and Alan says this poker game is getting way too out of hand. And then Elvis arrives. With pie.

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Of all the things to call back from earlier in the episode… Well, Alan asks Elvis for some help  so he can continue playing poker, and Elvis gives him half a million dollars.

Who came up with that ending?

Plaid:
Shirt – 7
I’m sure I must’ve missed a few, but WOW. Only 7 instances of plaid in this episode.

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